Hurt

It's taking awhile for the computer to load and post my last post. There. Now it's taking awhile again.

Anyway, (okay now it's working..) (well sorta) and something freaked me out! Now you can't see how many blogs I posted from my blog? I definitely need a computer.

Anyway, oh maybe because I dunno I thought you could see.

Anyway, this is so depressing.

Anyway, yea this page isn't loading.

Something embarrassing? I was feeling (wait why is nothing loading) (nevermind?) (oh it didn't save) (do I need to ask for a new computer today?) Anyway, when my stomach reminds me of Santa Clause is a bad sign. It's been a regular pot belly. However, I'm preoccupied with that part of my body and it's like a hole formed around the center from stress. I'm stressed a page isn't loading. I'm stressed my profile won't resave for like 1/2 hour. It doesn't matter for some reason. Anyway, I'm in a T-shirt. I can't stop thinking about it, and it's driving me insane. I have a life, and I don't like any distractions. Happy to say otherwise not too hurt though as of now. No one is nice to me though. No one cares, neither. Why would I tell anyone? It's like it had to bloat to heal and might look smaller later. I do need to use the restroom, as well, but that's not always a big deal when you're at home.

I just need to make the decision today. Oh, and no I didn't hurt myself. I don't know. I don't feel well. How can I ask for something? My computer clearly doesn't work. Hey double click did it.

It's just that once I ask for something important I can't like expect too much otherwise. This injury makes me feel a bit sensitive, though, like I have a fan on me of course, though that's good..

I'm really really mad, too, because it's not like it's something that's my fault or anything. I feel like I'm turning into ice cream from the fan.

Also, this page is not really loading. Try that again I guess I will. It's still taking a long time. I'm so mad. I'm just not feeling well to leave home. Why? Who knows? It's not particularly my fault.

First of all, I need a computer desk and we didn't see much. I'm tired. I also need a computer chair, a new one. Then again, maybe not, but I think I'd like one. I intended to get a couch at the same time. We supposedly are returning this laptop, too. Other things just include stacking shelves and a breakfast bar. Maybe, it's either a breakfast bar or a TV.

I wonder why IMDb's not loading now. Just, I think my profile when I double clicked to save. I haven't checked everything yet. Also, I don't see a bruise, but my stomach doesn't feel smooth. Why? I really feel an actual hole, like a dead snowman. It seems the internet slows down around 2 PM. I can't watch TV, neither.

Now it feels sorta like a cup. It's not even an admitted accident. Wow, I never really hurt anyone that I know of. I might need to wait just because of my health still. When will this be through? I'm so bored. This seriously isn't loading.

Now I feel my stomach getting smaller from the bottom, not sure why. Wow, Blogspot's not working. It's just a matter of consequence, though.

Well, I'll go ahead and post this. I had to restart and now my profile loaded. The internet wasn't working. Maybe now it will. I just wonder what I should post. I told my brother and dad all the things that happened while I was shopping. I have other things to post but not much. Just that when I yell my mom always barges in but this time the doorknob hit my smooth stomach. Funny it is because she left on this yoga TV thing she was recording. I just found we can record DVDs with this machine today. It was kinda crazy. I just said I didn't like her tone, the way she said the dog. Then, today, the dog was out, unusual I think, left by my father, which I thought was nice. They let the dog out when I'm upset I guess, maybe so he's not trapped. So, she said hi to him after I turned off my TV show and sounded like she was saying hi to me. So, I kept talking and got more mad yesterday but didn't hit the wall nor slam the door at first. At least. So, I guess that's it. I still am preoccupied with my stomach, though. I can't say things were ever fine, though. This has never happened. When she wouldn't get out at the old apartment, I kept shouting for her to leave and almost hit her eye with my clothes rack but the only time I hit her being around then when I was trying to watch Pirates of the Caribbean with my brother because of the way she did dishes. That was with a pillow. I through them at her. Then, later, I locked myself in my room. Of course it wasn't even hit hard, at all, but I'm stil preoccupied because I think stuff like that has an effect. It was pretty sensitive and feels crying and asinine a bit, like empty. So, it really was hurt, not that it wasn't anyway. By the way, I made this post once. Since posting so much, I got a black spot on my belly button on the inside. When I started posting regularly early 2008 somewhere else late 2007 my teeth got black because I said I was too sick to see the dentist and then my mouthwash when we moved I didn't find, though my brother had his. I was feeling bad to be seen by my fam then. This is all rather private, though, and still insignificant. It just isn't fair. I feel bad to begin with. It's to be expected, but what am I to do about finding a computer desk first? Maybe, my dad and I should make that our first goal. I can plan to get the biggest screen or I can think about liking this one's size. The nice thing is I can see my fingers more looking down at it. I think that shouldn't be an issue, but it was with a regular sized laptop. I don't think I can get a small screen like this. It doesn't make sense.

So, about a computer, I think a big Blu-Ray is good because the price is something I can handle in the difference more than using a smaller size. I think it's the computer that costs more. It's just a simple $1000, and I guess a couch is only $600 for 3 seats. Some are more, much more though. It's not like the prices strattled. They're all $500-$800. The reason I want one is because it's cheaper. My dad recommended not, but my ultimate goal would be probably to get a choice Blu-Ray TV screen. The guy advertising the Apple said it was good for like his sister who did things, compiling. I've seen all this, but no I don't make my own kinds of movies. I'm doing acrylics and probably need different shades of primary colors since I can't get different canvases. I truly do not do computer graphics. Funny my dad just asked me this, though, when I said if I do college for fun I wanna do computers (tech) because then I can do anything. It's the problem in everything. If only I knew all about it, I would have no problems.

So, maybe it was supposed to be funny I was hit but not that hardly. I do look thinner now I mentioned what's bothered me, also that I kept screaming because I thought crazy things. No one cares if I'm bothered if they try to talk by the noises they make forming words, and they think they're fast. I think that's freaky, though. I don't make weird allusions to things. By accident I found that ever since moving in with my family in Orlando or maybe since a certain time on vacation that any noise I made was a lot of words, sentences, or meanings, things I didn't say and didn't mean to have come to my mind. I think it's because I was feeling maybe not strong enough to work to think of something rather than let what wants to come to me come to me. So, why do I hurt more now than before? Can you imagine like hitting a thick plant leaf?