For some reason, I forget what I need to remember easily. No wonder I get so tired. Anyway, I'm happy I lay on my couch today. Another funny thing for me is I woke up @ 12:23 A.M. Yesterday, it was a little after 10 P.M. and I walked until a quarter to midnight. Usually, I walk 8 P.M. or maybe 9 P.M.
(Also, my computer is like haywire not connective. Okay, there it is. I can't get up and use the restroom? Oops, I forgot. It freezes my computer, whenever I leave for like 2 minutes.)
I'm not happy to say I regret a lot of things as well, I said.
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Okay, let me look over this real quick now:
While I wait to see, oh nevermind I remember how to format:
I'm getting tired of [poster.] If someone says something like that to me, I don't engage with them or cower as though I were stimulated. By tired I mean I'm tired of this every day. It's not funny. I don't care about these other posters. Everyone here is so slow.I wonder what this means. How can one suddenly claim to be tired of a person who did nothing wrong with whom you are disgusted? It's just not safe to say I feel that my relationship was affected by everyone else. The truth is everyone is calling my Mongy whenever something comes up because one person started it. I let rat I used to IM someone. So, this person was like white a lot like I am except apparently not called anything because he's simply European "unlike" me. So, I get made fun for my problems. I still have my standards, which are made fun of. That is to say the looking before leaping theory. I'm posting based on established stances. So, I'd have to say that means I'm tired of every other poster, which is a bad thing to say. There was nothing special about this one in this way.
Okay, though, I have to admit it upsets me when I catch something like that. I can't keep up with it. At least I made a decision about my life regarding faster computer and stuff. I think my dad'll like my idea as it saves money. My mom said thanks for doing the chore stuff. I'm sorry I can't make money. I know this will make them feel better, maybe save a few hundred dollars of some sort of relief affect. I think I'll win in the end because lke ... I'm doing well with the DVDs. I should be finished soon. I'm trying to recover old accounts and plan to by September. All I have left technically is Netflix. I'm waiting for access to a gmail account. I think that's all. I was happy because I imagined myself being a cook last night. I don't mean master chef or head cook. I mean like dirty work like chopping vegetables. I don't wanna host a grocery bakery. I don't wanna work in the back with a few people. I don't wanna be at Wal-Mart.
Okay, so back to the other issue. It was wrong for me to say because someone was stimulated in a bad way, like raped virtually online and stimulated in a bad way lke ... over and over that I should not do that further. My situation or question is what if because the fact is he didn't draw this particular attention in though was easy to see coming with me thre ... It just made me so unhappy that I thought I could not continue to relate with him. I never dump anyone totally. People want me to leave. Things caught on. I'm not interested in "if" he had a semen discharge, which is an insulting thing to have suggested already on a particular person for useage. Girls when they discharge get 1/4 cup of like egg yolk and possibly something like milk. This might happen a few times every few years or one year of their life. It doesn't happen like cracking an egg shell. You use the restroom and know it's there, a few times a ... every few months. There's always moisture there. You get it when you realize ends don't mean technically, like when your head feels like a hard shell, tight and empty, like a toy. It's kinda like being sloppy. I assume it leaks when you use the restroom. It's not really pee. It's the lining to the vagina, like when the blood walls cave in. It starts when you start to maybe think you're having a blood discharge. It happens before that. It happens when you have a figure, wheather or not you have been fully developed. So, what's the issue? The issue is maybe he's lost sexual interest in people such as me as a person. Maybe the board thinks it's funny because they know we aren't like them, but why should that matter other than that it disturbed me and we sorta trusted them in different ways.
So, what can I take comfort in? I can do the dishes, clean my water vat for a start. I can do more laundry, yea. I can try to throw stuff away, yea. I can try to finish that TV show, definitely. Yea I did wake up in the middle of my sleeping and do feel better. I wasn't prepared again for my dreams, but I liked it. I just went to bed after lying on my couch. So, the issue is what do I do when people stimulate this poster just because they know I supposedly looked up to him? Why does what I say carry inaccurate weight. The only thing wrong was that quote was my initial blow that I was "tired" of him. It came to me suddenly, had been tempting me. The board is a bad influence, as well as unsafe. I shouldn't be there, like. I should, but I shouldn't. I mean, I'm not ready yet, but I should be ready for when I am saying something, like. There are too many suggestions hidden in the way they talk to me. I'm not even really tired of that poster or any poster, so to hav said that is wrong ... It's just that this happened more than once and if this is what this poster apparently lives for, stimulation that discludes me pointedly and is directed as a peak insult toward anyone who likes him is just not doable. I don't also think he's really lost interest in good things, but as far as a message board, yes, the innocent things we had all come to depend on is unbelievable. I saw this poster has posts a lot on British politics. That just leads me to thinking of cheap racism against white Americans and people with partial European ancestry who are "white." People are so greedy for the non-European. I've met some tricky a little people who think they have the real deal by not being some fake American being taken advantage of by like the Norwegians here, who are cheap and low nad dirty. I just don't think this poster should have such an elevated status as far as maybe looking cool, and it has affected me mentally. I don't mean sexually stimulated. I don't mean affected mentally. Intellecually, no I don't mean that. I mean, get it through. This poster isn't cute racially. It's just another poster and it's messed up. That's clear enough, someone who's jealous of this poster some people like. Someone without any information with nothing to say but to put others out on a limb down.
So, I think my life's alright insofar as I have stuff planned out. I come here to wind down. I'm feeling better with my hair shaved. It's definitely coming back in by September. It feels like a carpet now.
Also, I don't think that poster was supposed to intrude his disgusting influence as though it meant something to process, to process out.
Wow, today, I can make a vanilla pudding, yum, though I want chocolate. I got a little tired of chocolate, too. Not really of chocolate altogether, just that I need more things. Maybe I'll even have hamburgers today or make pizza. My life isn't really wasted so much as I am really figuring more out. I want a successful life online. I want my passwords back to those things. I need to set things up more carefully now. It's about good writing skills, processing past experience, answering posts. It's about things like your real life, so someone doesn't say why don't you go outside. It's about things like finishing those 2 particular TV shows, just the first season because the other one was hardly worth it, plus is missing the 5th being recorded seemingly. Then, I have my Netflix stuff sitting here that's coming in and won't be too long. After that, I'm free to go. This stuff is just that girl from Alice in Wonderland. I'm reading on films otherwise, so I haven't done the old ones. Someone was even asking, posted a topic at IMDb, to say or ask if they should see the cartoon again. Of course, I haven't been answering as much, though it's obvious I check it all still. When it gets crazy, I'll need a better computer, the next size larger laptop if that's soon I guess. I was thinking I should wait until I'm much better for a very good computer. I'll ask my dad that if like with this test laptop I can test another one and then when my room is ready and I'm ready, when the TV shows are done, if I can set my room up for when I work so I can come home and just watch TV and have a real computer then and a little before then, which would be like Halloween. Maybe it's Christmas. It seems like it should be sooner even.
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